Avoiding Pitfalls of December glutton fest, drink-a-thon, family/relationship stress

I have good news and bad news; The bad news is that you can't totally avoid sugary cookies, obligatory Holiday parties or awkward reunions with family members. The good news is that I have a few tips so you can at least survive the month of December and possibly enter January 2014 kicking a little bit of ass, as opposed to feeling 10lbs heavier, depressed and like you need a liver transplant.
Uno: It's only Dec 2nd and you've put the jeans away and are starting to wear the frumpy sweater/black tights combo.

Unless you are going to walk through this month with a blind fold on, you have to be armed and ready with tricks on how to avoid the holiday 10lbs weight gain.  Everyone starts to feel a little crummy after Thanksgiving and the thing I hear most when talking to my patients is "I'm just going to forget the gym and eat everything I see until New Years".  Let me start by telling you that unless you are the 1% of people that can actually do that without feeling guilty, sad or angry WHILE you are eating whatever you want, you should probably adjust that mentality.  A healthier more sustainable mentality might be to accept that this may not be your red-carpet-ready body month, but maintaining weight is your December goal. So, with that in mind here are a few tips to help you get through it:

•  Eat smaller portion controlled meals throughout the day. Have a handful of something healthy (nuts, fruit, juice, protein shake, hummus, veggies) every 3-4 hours so that you don't get to the end of your day on an empty stomach, metabolism is shut off then you throw 15 pigs in blankets, shnitzels, meatball sliders and cheesecake bites in your mouth. The #1 to gain weight is by eating a ton of shitty food on an empty stomach (I'm allowed to say shitty because I'm my own boss :-)
• Load up on Fiber. Eat books, sawdust and bran meal. If that doesn't sound appetizing try fiber rich foods like apples, lentils, peas, beans, artichokes, broccoli, raspberries, pears or oatmeal.  Fiber is a great way to regulate your poop (I'm allowed to say that too) and feel full so you're not grabbing at random pork entrail appetizers at every chance. 
• DRINK WATER. I know this is something we've all heard a million times but did you know that most of the pangs of hunger we get during the day are actually our bodies telling us we are dehydrated??? = shoving left over office cupcakes down the hatch will saddlebag, not hydrate you. Drink up to eat less!

Dos: Cirrhosis is Sexy and you want the Alcoholic red reindeer nose.

 I'm going to be honest, don't have a ton of smart options here, my expertise lies in the "getting rid of hangovers" arena (thank you Canadian whiskey loving blood line for that). Ultimately, it's going to be about the quantity of drinks you consume, duh. So here are some tips on how to avoid hangovers, cut craft cocktail calories and not have the water cooler story be starring you the day after the Christmas party.

• Pound your Multis. Especially B-vitamins prior to drinking. You know all those "Anti-hangover" products? The main ingredients are always heavy duty B vitamins, so if you take them prior to drinking, then have a ton of water while you drink your chances of making that 8am conference call without having to mute for wretching noises will improve greatly. 
• One Drink, One Water. Elongate that "I'm so cool, sexy and everyone is interested in what I'm saying" vibe you have going from 1-3 drinks and make it your evening shtick by substituting every second drink for water. Plus you're cutting calories in half!
• Stay away from sugary drinks. Sugar = empty calories and hangover city. Stick to vodka, red or white wine, light beer (just hide the label with a napkin), mix with water or on the rocks instead of sugary mixers. 
• Have a half portion of protein when you get home from drinking all night, it will soak up the alcohol, fill you up and decrease the egg mcmuffin craving the next day.

Tres: Your family is insane. Still. 

We all have one, the "dysfunctional family" term is so overused these days that my jaw drops when people tell me they don't have family issues. That's of course when I find out they walk their dog in a stroller and their father cross dresses, but only to his NRA meetings. 
The best way to approach stressful holiday reunions is calmly, grounded and with compassion. For this I prescribe supplements because my license doesn't allow me to inject a morphine-xanax cocktail (I'm working on an online certification from Yemen... stay tuned). If the following natural Qi balancing and calming practices of yoga, meditation, taking a walk, deep breathing, journaling or talking with your therapist aren't completely taking the edge off, I have three magical little supplements for you to try this holiday season. You can take one, two or have a real party and take all three depending on what type of stress you tend to deal with.  So disregard your therapist's advice for a hot second and self diagnose below, then email me, come get poked and I'll get you a survival bottle for the holidays.

• Escape Restraint formula is for what we call in Chinese Medicine "Qi Stagnation". I call it the Anger/frustration management pill. This emotional representation looks like: I'm-so-frustrated-with-everyone-around-me-why-are-they-all-assholes-if-they-just-did-things-my-way-everything-would-be-fine-but-nobody-understands-me with a side of quick temper, possible headaches, feeling hot, acid reflux, nausea, abdominal bloating and ribside pain. If all you have is the frustration/emotional symptoms then don't worry, you can take this formula on a short term basis to survive the holidays or whatever other emotional situation has you in knots. It beats alcoholism and terrets-like anger outbursts.                                                                                                                                                                
• PS Calm is my go-to winter blues formula. This is my herbal anti-depression like supplement. It's the holiday bummer/I can't believe the year is over already/I'm not married or have kids/I don't have the job I want or am not the person I want to be and cry about it more than I'd like to admit/just don't feel motivated to get out and do much anymore supplement. It gently builds Qi and blood while boosting mood and throws in a kick of "It's not that big of a deal". And, yes I realize this whole blog is a grammatical, punctuation and run-on sentence nightmare. But it's full of interesting tidbits and swear words so I'm keeping it up.                                                          
• Herbal Xanax I've nicknamed this clever little formula because I've given it to my anxiety patients to successfully take the place of their meds without making them feel like someone stole their frontal lobe.  It gently takes the edge of the mind racing, heart palpitations and shallow breathing symptoms replacing them with peace, calm and a little "I'm a Boss" attitude (who doesn't want to feel like a Boss?). See the below testimonial for reference
  

So with all of those wonderful suggestions, I've pretty much covered everything but a cure for world hunger and how to find your one true love. Next month I'll tackle those, in the meantime feel free to email me with thoughts or questions and my apologies NRA members, I'm not picking on you it's just easy :-)